An invitation to: Prayer

/

In this post, we at Growing Together Families are focusing on prayer. You can listen to this podcast episode here.

Spiritual Practices as Tools

Before we look at this spiritual discipline, I want to take this opportunity to share with you how I understand spiritual disciplines or faith practices as tools that God gives us to connect to God and neighbor.  I invite you to imagine that you are carrying a tool box on your faith formation journey. Mine is red, and sometimes orange.  Yours can be what every color you want. When we try a new spiritual practice we are picking up a new tool that helps us do the important work of loving God and neighbor. God gives us multiple tools to do this work. When we pick up a new tool it is important to remember that we will each have different experiences as we try to use that tool in our daily lives. Using a tool for the first time takes time, energy, and practice as we strive to get better at using it in our daily lives. It can feel messy and hard.  If we haven’t picked up a tool in a while- it might need sharpening. If we’ve been carrying a tool around with us for awhile, we might discover new ways to use it. It’s important to recognize and celebrate when a tool works for us too.  No matter our experience with a spiritual discipline, the more we pick it up and practice using it, the easier it will get and the more comfortable we will become. It is important to remember that practice helps us develop skills and offers an opportunity to grow and learn. As you and your family practice using a spiritual discipline together I encourage you to be patient with one another as you each learn how to best use the tool in your faith walk with God. It’s important to remember that as you add tools to your toolbox you and your family might have tools that each of you prefer to use and that you may find different tools more helpful than others. Be patient with one another as you find the tools that work best for you and your family.

In this blog we will be focusing on the spiritual discipline: prayer.

What is prayer? 

Prayer is a “means of grace” through which we experience the presence and grace of God. In prayer, we make ourselves available to God, opening ourselves to the power of God’s love that heals and forms us into the image of Christ. Prayer is a tool that helps us connect to God. It’s a way we can communicate what we are experiencing, feeling, hoping, anxious about and it’s a space for us to listen and reflect too. Through prayer we create space and open ourselves to God’s presence. As we do this holy work, we open ourselves up to the possibility that we will be changed. 

I love how children talk about prayer as a conversation with God. One child once told me: I can tell God anything. And it’s true! If you want to hear more about how children understand prayer check out this video. 

As we think about prayer as a tool that helps us connect with and talk to God, we recognize that this is an important tool for us to practice using as we model this work for our families. Remember, we learn when something is modeled and when we have an opportunity to practice. As you practice incorporating prayer in your life and in your homes you have an opportunity to model this practice for your family and to invite them to practice using this tool too! I encourage you to set aside time every day to do this important work together.

When to pray

The beauty is we can talk to God whenever we want- either silently or out loud. Historically people of faith have allowed the rhythm of the day to provide prayer opportunities- patterning a life of prayer after the hours of the day- morning, midday- evening- and night. The liturgy of the hours includes 8 opportunities to pray intentionally. This helps us know that we can pattern our day by times so you might find a specific time of day when you want to pray or when you want to invite your family to pray.

You might choose to pray during certain events of the day. This might be when you wake up, at meal times, or at bedtimes. As we talked about in the previous blog and podcast episode, rituals and routines are extremely important. Daily events help us identify a reoccurring opportunity when you and your family can pray together. 

You might choose to practice this spiritual discipline when you are feeling specific emotions. When you or a family member are experiencing anxiety, stress, fear, or sadness you might choose to stop and talk to God and each other. Prayer is a wonderful tool when we are joyful and thankful too! In all of our emotions we can turn to God to express how we are feeling and to ask for help. 

My grandmother modeled this for me. She always prayed every time she got into the car and before she started the engine. I’ve picked up this practice praying as I put on my seatbelt: “God watch over me and others in this car and on the road. Please keep all of us safe.”

For me, my individual prayer time comes as I sit down at my desk to start my morning work. Journaling and prayer help me focus on what God is calling me to do that day. 

For my family, mealtimes and bedtime provide communal opportunities for prayer as we gather together to thank God for food and for all the gifts of the day. 

I wonder:

  • When do you pray?

  • When does your family pray?

How to pray

As you and your family decide the best way to pray together, it is important to remember that there is not one right time or one right way to pray. There are a lot of different ways to pray and many resources to help you with this work. You can find some resources to guide you below.

Prayers can be written down, or they might flow from the heart. Prayers can also be a time of silence. On days when we cannot find the words we can simply pray:

God, I don’t have the words. Thank-you for being with me. I am so grateful that you know what is on my heart. Stay close, as I need you now.

Sometimes the silence is what our bodies, our hearts, and our minds need as we sit in the loving embrace of our creator. 

In times when it is difficult to pray, you can also ask others to pray with you or for you. 

It is important to recognize that people of all ages need silence and stillness.  I invite you to consider:  how are you providing silence and space to simply sit in the comforting presence of God?

There are different types of prayers too:

Breath Prayers

Breath prayers are short prayers that you can say when you are feeling stressed, anxious, or afraid. One of my favorite breath prayers is this one:

(Breathe in) Be Still

(Breathe out) And know that I am God

When you are practicing a breath prayer you will want to breathe in and out slowly and intentionally. If you are leading your family in a breath prayer you will want to encourage them to breathe in and out slowly and quietly too. As you pray this prayer the hope is that the process and the words will calm your body. The goal is to help your body relax as your breath and heart rate slows and as you find God’s peace as you sit in the presence of God. 

Body prayers:

Another one of my favorite ways to pray is with body prayers. For those who like to move body prayers help us move as we talk to God. Some choose to pray as they run or walk, others pray while they move through a series of yoga poses. The hand prayer is one of my favorite body prayers for children as it teaches prayer using their hand which serves as a mnemonic device to help them remember the flow of the prayer as they practice. The hand prayer is great for adults when we get stuck and cannot find the words too!

As you and your family practice praying together, you will find your own rhythm as you discover the times and approaches that work best for you. 

For my family, our bedtime prayers have evolved as we have moved through the ritual every night. We begin by sharing joys and concerns, then we say a prayer thanking God for our family and friends lifting up those joys and concerns. We then say a prayer from a book my sister-in-law gave us for our son’s baptism. Many months ago, we picked up the book, looked through it, and chose one that we liked. We have been praying that prayer ever since. I am sure that if we went back and looked at the book we would find that the actual words of the prayer are very different as I’m sure we have changed them over time- and that’s ok. My hope is that as you and your family discover resources and tools that work for you, that you too will find ways to make them your own. My family chooses to conclude our prayer time with the Lord’s prayer since this is a prayer from our faith tradition that we want our son to learn as this is a prayer our faith community says together every week in worship. 

As you and your family practice this important discipline, I know that you will discover what is best for you and your family. It is important to remember that there is not one way to use this tool. The only way you will know what will work for you and your family is to pick up the tool and to try it out. If it doesn’t work the first time, I want to encourage you to try again, or to shift the practice a little bit seeing if you can find a way to make the practice work for you and your family. It is easy to set aside a practice when it doesn’t work- especially when things are chaotic and messy. I encourage you to try, and try again. You are also invited to share your experiences in the Growing Together Families Facebook page. Life is messy and this is a place for you to share your celebrations and acknowledge your frustrations as you find support for this important work. Let us know how it is going.  This is where we can learn from one another and encourage one another. 

In all things know that it is the practice that matters. Through our intentional work we can continue to connect to God and each other. 

Invitation to a spiritual practice

Prayer: Identify a time every day to pray

Action Challenge

Try a new prayer at your chosen time.

Prayer

Dear God, thank-you for listening to us when we pray. In times of uncertainty we are grateful we can turn to you for guidance and comfort. Hear us as we share our joys [insert here] and our concerns [insert here]. Keep us safe. It’s in your holy name we prayer, AMEN

Resources: